Things I wish I knew at 18
1. High school friendships don’t last.
Not the way you want them to anyway.
Even if you swam oceans of pain together.
Even if you never wanted to drift apart.
Friendships fall apart.
Most times they sadly do.
2. Your parents will still treat you like a child. They don’t care about your legal reality. When you’re with them, they still see you as their baby. That can get frustrating but also comforting.
3. Your undergrad degree won’t matter as much as you think it will. So choose what you want to explore. Don’t choose something you think is going to be your career. Chances are when you graduate you will be doing something completely different than what you were dead sure of when you started college.
Explore.
4. People are more selfish now. People are more broken now. People are more cautious now. Everyone has been through something that haunts them.
5. Everyone is suffering. Some will use that as an excuse to mistreat you. Some will because of that very reason be there for you in your suffering in anyway they can. Most times it’s hard to tell which person you’re being. Don’t be an ass.
6. Not everyone makes life long friends in college. You won’t. That’s okay. Nothing good comes out of forceful relations anyway. It can get lonely but at least that kind of loneliness isn’t because of shitty company.
7. Grades. Internships. Extra curricular activities. They matter. Everyone acts like it doesn’t but it does. Whatever choice you make, whatever your course may be, how you perform does matter. It isn’t everything but it matters.
8. Self care isn’t boring or unnecessary. It’s important. It’s hard but it’s crucial.
You don’t have to click pictures for aesthetics or share your progress. You can if it helps. But you don’t have to. Because that’s secondary. You know what’s primary. Do it.
9. Just because you become an adult by a number and are recognized as one because of law doesn’t mean you aren’t you anymore.
The way you are at 17 years 364 days, is the way you will remain at 18. Perhaps 19.
That’s okay.
There’s a lot learn. You may have fought and conquered adolescence but this is a completely different story. There are new skills and lessons to be learned. All previous ones may not necessarily remain valid.
10. You genuinely have to learn to let go.
Imagine your life to be a tiny box. A box that fits in your palm. If that box is full of past pain, regret and disappointments, of all the people who broke you, of negativity and dried blood, all the good things and beautiful people that are to come into your life will fall right off because there just isn’t enough space in that box. It is full of everything you don’t need or deserve.
Good things will come your way, they will fall into your hands but you still won’t be happy if you don’t remember to take out the trash.
creatingnikki